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Can I Do It Tomorrow?

I just slept for two hours just now, and my head is still kinda heavy, but I can't get to sleep. So maybe I will try to do something bored. But here's where the contradiction come: Things that can make you bored will eventually make me sleepy, but if it is boring, why do I bother doing it in the first place? I can do a lot of other things like watching anime or reading manga. But the point here is to get to sleep, so just do it. It's boring, so I decided not to do it, and do other things.

So anyway, I am kinda bure bure bure bure right now, because I woke up after sleeping halfway. During my sleep, I dream about playing as a real soldier in Call of Duty: Black Ops. I don't know why, don't ask me. But in that dream, I keep on losing, like real bad. So after this I think I'm going to play a few rounds of Team Deathmatch to prove that the dream is wrong hahahahaha.

This is random, but I know I shouldn't let despair get into me for too long. Now is the time to let positive thoughts and happy happy things get inside of my head~~ Weee. Being sad for too long will be bad for my health. I realized a few days ago that I always forgot to take my meals, and there was this period where I didn't eat for three days. I know it's nothing when compared to yours, so just at least let me finish =D So when I realized that I'm truly hungry, I eat a lot and I will get stomach ache. It has been like this for more than a week, but I'm sure my stomach will become better gradually.

It took me this long to realize that being sad won't change anything. I know, I am always like this, because I don't like suppressing myself. If I'm sad, I know I'm sad, and will show it to the whole world. Haha I know that it is bad, but at least I feel better after expressing myself for a while. I am not hating people who suppress themselves because it's your own choice, I am just saying that I prefer to express myself rather than keeping it deep beneath my heart. ok? :)

I know that right now, I am still a sad being, but I don't to be more miserable and terrible to myself. I think it is long enough for me to be in despair, and I should start filling myself with hope, and put a smile on my face~~ Everyday, I will keep renewing my thoughts and expressions, so that I can do through each day with less troubling myself.

I'm positive that tomorrow will be a better day!


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