It's a Wonderful Life

It was the day of festival, where Muslims all over the world celebrates Eid al-Adha. As usual, most people go back to their parents or grandparents house to celebrate it with their family. On Instagram, everyone was posting their best pictures on that day, showing how happy they are with their family, the delicious foods that they ate, or  how beautiful their hometown is. Those posts made me really unhappy. I don't have any trouble of others being happy. In fact, I believe no one should be overly sad or to suffer from anything bad. The problem lies when I start to compare myself with them. Why am I so unhappy on this day? How can they smile so radiantly while I am here feeling miserable with myself? I can also post some pictures and try to smile as genuinely as I can, but I know deep down inside, I will be mostly faking it. Being in this world nowadays where there are too much information to absorb (or being shoved to your face), the information that 'everyone is happy wi

My current emotional state is like this: I am sitting in a room. The door and the windows are open. I let things and people come in freely, and I will entertain anyone who enters my room. But I, for sure, will not come out of that room. The room is open but the mental barrier is there.