It's a Wonderful Life

One thing that I really need to keep reminding myself is that no one walked my path, so they don't have any responsibilities to either understand me or to follow the way I am right now. Lately I have been thinking that I want to help my classmates who are having troubles in their studies. If I can score well, why couldn't they? That's what I thought in the beginning. But in the end, it is up to each of them to decide for themselves. There are no guarantee that great results will lead to a better life, after all. Even for myself, it's not necessary for me to follow the exact footsteps of someone else. Yes, I may follow that person from behind but someday I need to follow my own path, so that others will do the same. After we go our own path, that is when we used what we learned from other's path and mix it up with our own flavor so that it will suit our next journey. I know this one man, whom I admired a lot due to his knowledge and resourcefulness. The way he

When something that we want is hard to get, we will work hard to achieve it. We pray a lot, we just do our best and be happy with whatever the outcome will be. Then come the fated day, you get what you truly want, or maybe better. That's when you know that it is not impossible to reach what you think was unreachable. You start to have higher target, or have expectations that you will get it again. This is the turning point of your expectation. When you get what you expect, you just say "good" and move on. When you don't get what you expect, you will get mad, saying that you deserve to get it. One day, you just never get what you expect. The goes for the next day, and so on. You never get what you expected anymore. Why do this happen? Then after you get what you want again, you realized how happy and excited you are. That's the feeling that you forgot for this whole time. Being grateful. Appreciate what you have and what you get. Don't let it be too late:

"saya minat matematik sebab ayah saya ajar" "saya start minat matematik masa darjah lima, bila saya dah start faham apa yang cikgu ajar pastu rasa macam tak susah pun matematik ni!" "saya start minat matematik masa form one, sebab saya selalu dapat score tinggi" "saya cemburu dengan cousin saya dia asyik cakap dia dapat 98 dalam matematik masa darjah lima dulu, sebab tu saya belajar matematik pastu jadi minat" This is what they told me when they introduced themselves. Kids are so pure-hearted, can easily love things that they do even for the smallest reasons. As long as they believe they can do it, they will continue to love it.    Now, I want to relate this with my experiences. Not really mine, but those around me. I asked a few of my friends, why did they choose this course (Math, Stats, or Actuary). I believe I got around 7 out of 10 saying that "because I like Mathematics and numbers".  When we have an interest in

As we go on longer into a relationship, we tend to forget that it is always the small things that matter the most actually. A father may still gives his son allowance every month, but he forgot to smile to him whenever he gave the money. A sister asking some helps from her brother, but never said thanks or showed any appreciations. A boyfriend takes his girlfriend to an expensive dinner, but forgets that all she wants is only some attentions from him and occasional words of "I love you". Humans are so arrogant, thinking that they will have everyone stay by their side forever, even if they are being asshole to them. When we forget to appreciate, we forget to let them know the little things that make them happy. When that someone gone from your life forever, don't come to them and beg for forgiveness. It might be too late to ask for forgiveness when you are too late to realize. Never forget the little things that you can do that can make a lot of differences in your

Suddenly I had this thought that I really love studying. For now, it is specific to things that we learned in our syllabus. Yes, studying about those things that we learned in class is actually fun to me. The first time I ever feel the joy of studying was during May 2012, when I stayed up the whole night studying for my final exams at library. I studied a chapter, redo the examples and a few exercises, then if I can answer most of the questions, I move on to the next chapter. I did that for every final paper, and somehow it clicked to me that I really love studying. The whole three years at UW, I didn't study a lot. Mostly just playing games, taking my easy time there, and just relax. I didn't feel any responsibility or urge to study. I was so irresponsible back then. I hope I won't lose this feeling and this chance to study anymore. I am thankful for this third change, and I wont let it go to waste. Some people might think that I'm too 'semangat' or eager