It's a Wonderful Life

As I thought more about myself, there are a few things that become clear to me Have you ever see kids on the street that dress up in some kind of not ordinary way just to show that they are matured than the rest of the other kids? But in the end, they succeeded in showing that there are not really matured as to their thoughts Just want to show what will happen if we thought that we are better at things, while actually we don't That's what happened to me, when I thought I had become mature enough to be in love I ended up destroying my life (not that much, but it still has some effects) and the one that I love It won't be such a problem if it only involves me, but the thing is it affected others, which shouldn't happen That is the devil fruit of love when it is grown with sins The roots absorbed the nutritions of lustful feelings How dark my life and heart and that time I try to runaway, but it will not solve anything So I pretend like nothing happened, and try to reminis

Yup! ;)

Just now my friends and I went to do some works for the upcoming Raya (not gonna write details about that) Our time from 11 pm until 3 am is filled with laughter and sarcasm, with me teasing most of my friends (Sorry Arif, Afiqah, Yatie, Ain and Naimah for my over-the-limit jokes) At one point after I had tease Ain Syazwi enough, someone asked something specific about me (can't remember whether it's Ain or Farah) After hearing that question, I realized that it has been a long time since someone asked anything specific about me Not just some typical question like "How are you?" or "Are you feeling well?" Ask typical questions and you will get typical responses ("Yeah I'm fine", "Alhamdulillah sihat") I guess it had been a long time since I expressed my inner thoughts to others After 'that' incident, I've completely restrained myself from talking about my problems to others, everyone Maybe I being too strict to myself that I

Yeah, I never feel that I am in America right now How I wish I can run from everything

As the title suggest, I still couldn't sleep right now The clock at the lower left shows that it is 2:48 a.m. I'm kinda amused by myself since this rarely happens Usually I just sleep soundly until my shadow is about my own length (after sahur and subo) This hand is urging to deliver a message, not to a specific someone nor with a specific content Just feels like typing; it is indeed a satisfaction Man, I'm really outta control but I still want to write this .. ... ..... ...... I really like this picture and I don't even mind staring at it for a long time Looking at this picture, a lot of emotional sense towering concretely inside me Right now, at this very moment, I suddenly feel very empty and lonely even though a lot of my friends is around me I'm just like an empty vessel, filled with nothingness I can't think of anything, or even something Depressed? Sad? It is not a negative feeling It just...like a room with all the furnitures and everything but no living

Yeah, I don't have anything to post just yet :( Maybe coz' I don't have any ideas, mood or inspiration But the best explaination would be 'since my friends in Madison already narrated everything about Madison in their blog' If you want to know more about Madison, maybe you can check my friends' blog, since what we saw in Madison are mostly the same, especially in our early life here I'll put them under the category 'My friends in Madison' later I'll post if there anything unusual or differs from another ;)

This is the place where we had our convocation~~ ________________________________________________________ After a very long and tiring journey, we arrived at Madison last week (24th August) So, how about our life here? Hey wake up already! Everything's great here! That's simplify everything~~ People here are nice; you don't know anything just ask them directly (Better than Malaysian who claim that they are nice but actually they don't. I'm sorry, but it is the truth, people here are way much nicer) It is hard to adapt to the climate here, but I'll be just fine It's frickin' cold here, especially after rains had stopped You will be covering yourself with a blanket and maybe another comforter Right now there are no problems on getting foods since we are in fasting month We still have a lot of food supply that we brought from Malaysia and foods that we bought during our shopping here~~ And there is a senior who delivers food to us for break fast (USD5.00 pe